Wow, reading about ADHD has made me feel like I have been reading a book about my life with Madison, like it was wrote specifically about us.
(Here is just one definition for those unfamiliar with it...ADHD refers to a chronic disorder that initially manifests in childhood and is characterized by hyperactivity, impulsivity, and/or inattention. Not all of those affected by ADHD manifest all three behavioral categories. These symptoms can lead to difficulty in academic, emotional, and social functioning. The diagnosis is established by satisfying specific criteria and may be associated with other neurological, significant behavioral, and/or developmental/learning disabilities. Therapy may consider the use of medication, behavioral therapy, and adjustments in day-to-day lifestyle activities. )
I always knew that of course you feel better when you eat healthy, everybody knows that. But I never knew to what extent that unhealthy food could have on behavior and brain developement. The majority of people in the world of ADHD believe diet has a major role in treatment, believing that being sensitive to chemicals causes these symptoms of ADHD. If you don't know about it, there is this diet, or program now as it's called, The Feingold Program:
"For several weeks, you use only foods that arefree of synthetic dyes, artificial flavors and three preservatives, as well asa group of foods known as “natural salicylates.” All of these acceptablefoods are likely to be well tolerated. If this trial results in an improvementin your child’s behavior, or in other target symptoms, then the testbecomes the treatment. You simply continue to enjoy the foods and thepositive change in your child. After a few weeks of success you cangradually expand the food choices, adding back natural salicylates one at atime, and watching for any return of the old behaviors. The Program is aform of the time-honored allergy elimination diet. The focus, however, ison all the foods that are allowed, not on those removed."
There is a book that goes along with the diet called "Why can't my child behave?" I have only read a few pages so far and already feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my chest, like I havn't been a bad parent for the past 4 years, she really has been an especially difficult child and for a reason. So many things that have been written make me think "YES, that is her!" And "I never noticed that, but that is true too." So while I am reading I just wanted to start copy and pasting things that I want to address so I don't forget when we have her evaluation next month.
First there are some questions the book asks:
Does your child get upset too easily?
Does she seem to not hear what you are saying?
Is her motor stuck on fast forward?
After you have carefully explained why he cannot do something,and he seems to understand, do you turn your back only to havehim repeat the behavior?
Do you sense that she really can't help the way she behaves?
Do other children avoid playing with your child?
Does she have difficulty interacting with children her age?□ Does he always seem to be touching every person and object inhis reach?□ Is she fine one minute, and out of control the next?□ Do all the games have to be played his way, with his rules?□ Does she seem to be off in her own little world?□ Can he go from here to there and lose something?□ Does she laugh too loud, or inappropriately?□ Is he really just like other kids, only much more so?
The answer to all of those questions is YES. There were only 3 out of the 17 that were no, and that is because 2 of them didn't apply bc she isn't in school yet and the other was does she have trouble understanding facial expressions, I don't *think* that is a problem. All of the others describe her very well.
"Techniques that were successful with most ofthe children I had taught rolled off my daughter as though she was coatedwith Teflon." -Yep, nothing works with Madison that people have ever told me to do, I read, or spanking. Some things work in the moment, nothing long term.
"Laura was bright and precocious, possessing a greatvocabulary and normal hearing, but my attempts to communicate with herwere like reasoning with a rock. " - Oh my goodness, yes. She just has to keep arguing, even if it's off subject.
"When I tried to make eye contact, herglances darted all over the room." - She does this very often, when I tell her to pay attention to me, it's as if it's so hard for her to look at me, like she has to physically try hard to keep looking and always fails even if I threaten to punish her if she doesn't pay attention.
"When I asked her a question, herresponse -- at those times when she responded at all -- was very good, buthad no relation to the question I had asked."- Madison does this ALL the time, just goes off arguing or talking about something else, usually something that doesn't make any sense. Like "You cannot pick up Tyler." Her reply..."Well, sometimes I itch" (said with an attitude as if she is making a good argument to what you just said.) or "Well, you're always mean to me."
"Laura was not always distracted and difficult. There were times whenshe was fine. When she was impossible, I never knew what I had donewrong, and when she was good, it was equally puzzling what I had doneright! Sometimes Madison is so adorable, sweet and respectful and so much fun. Sometimes I don't even like her, I told John that a few weeks ago and it was so hard to say out loud.
"Of all the sadness such a child brings into your life, I think the worst isthat it’s so hard to like them. It isn’t hard to love them; that’s part of thejob description. But what saddened me most of all was that I found it sodifficult to like this little girl I had wanted so much."
"Every new step a child takes is viewed hopefully by the parent of achemically sensitive youngster. “She’s bound to do better once she getsinto school.” “Now that he’s five, he’s sure to settle down.” Parentssearch for the magical solution: a new school or day care, a newneighborhood, new therapist, new doctor, new activity, new parentingcourse. The list goes on and parents add to their disappointmentcollection. Some of these changes may be of help, but if the problem rests within the child, the symptoms follow him wherever he goes, and any improvement is still short of the mark." Yep, that is what I have been thinking, that school would help.
"For the first four and a half years of my daughter’s life, I questionedwhat was wrong with my parenting. I asked advice from virtuallyeveryone who knew Laura, but they didn’t know what to suggest. Then Idecided that two well-meaning people, doing their best for four and a halfyears, couldn’t have made that many mistakes. Maybe the problem laywith my daughter; maybe there was something wrong with her“chemistry,” although I had no idea what that meant." I could have written that word for word, replaing Laura with Madison and that's it.
"By this time I was ready to accept the possibility that my child mightnot be normal, and even the heavy-duty labels -- emotionally disturbed, orwhatever -- would have been a relief of sorts. At least it would haveexplained things. But there were many times when Laura behaved verynormally, and she was clearly precocious: speaking early, teaching herselfto read, and sounding out new words by age three-and-a-half. And I couldnot accept that a child could be emotionally disturbed on just Mondays,Wednesdays and Fridays."
And this is about chemically sensitive children as infants...
"He screams with the volume turnedup to the maximum, stops taking naps long before Dr. Spock predicted,and is difficult to get to sleep at night."
Everyone that knew Madison for very long as a baby knows she had the worst piercing scream, it really hurt your ears. My friend wouldn't even ride with me because of it. And she stopped taking naps at 18 months, which people couldn't believe, but I couldn't get her to sleep unless she woke up extremely early. And she always had to nurse to sleep, she wouldn't go to sleep any other way until after we weaned and she had no choice.
"The day she was born, the nurse warned me she was hyperactive,”Lita’s mother recalls. “But she was such a bright, lovable baby that wedidn’t even realize she was hyperactive until she started the Feingold dietat age 4." -OMG - the nurse told me the day Madison was born "Oh she's gonna be a difficult one."
"He is often clumsy in his interactions with otherchildren. He bumps into them, or pushes his chair into their desks,interrupts, misses the point of a story, laughs too loud or at the wrongtime, and doesn’t understand how close is too close, or where his spaceends and the next person’s begins"
Madison is very overwhelming and overbearing to other kids unless they are just like her. Her neighbor friend came over to play once and left and never came back, and told us it was because Madison wouldn't quit pulling/pushing on her- trying to get her to do what she wanted. She is so feely-touchy, can't keep her hands to herself, is so in your face, and thinks everyone should do what she wants.
So now that I am convinced that this could very well be our problem, here is what we are going to try to do about it. Hopefully in the next several weeks before her appt with the holistic pediatrician who specializes in treating ADHD naturally, we can see some improvements. And even if ADHD isn't the case, there is no doubt that eating better will help at least a little because these things listed below have an effect on everyone, it's just some are especially sensitive to them. We will be going through the process of eliminating these things...
Food dyes (a.k.a. food colors, synthetic colors, artificial colors, coal tar dyes, FD&CYellow No. 5, etc.)Artificial flavorings (including “vanillin” or synthetic vanilla)Aspartame (synthetic sweetener) and its powerful cousin NeotameThree antioxidant preservatives: BHA, BHT, TBHQAspirin and a group of foods which contain “natural salicylates” -- a naturallyoccurring chemical which is similar to aspirin.
Wish us luck :)
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